so my neighbor is 47 years old and he has more than 2 million dollars.
i used to go over when i needed like… sugar or cream LOL but yeah he was betting on horses for fun and had an account of $30,000 and said it was his “play account” or some shit.

he said he started stocks at my age and is now a millionaire… and then he told me he was giving it all to his son when he died and should accumulate more than $5,000,000… WHY CAN’T I BE HIS SON?

anyways, he’s a really nice guy and he’s also in the closet (omfg i’m scared he’s going to rape me) but i asked him if he could help me and he said that it takes “time and discipline.”

and i said “i have a lot of time.
and you can teach me discipline :)”

BUT I THINK HE MISTOOK THAT AS FLIRTING OMFG I SWEAR TO GOD. ;~; i just want to be a millionaire, sheesh! anyways, he seems like a lonely old guy so i said i would accompany him and chat like a good neighbor if he taught me about stocks. i have way too much time to burn in my hand, anyways.

ok time to go eat ramen.

talk to the left 

cause you aint right

so i was talking to my friend about how uncomfortable it would be if a homophobic straight guy was roomed with me in college.
and then i realized…

I’M A FREAKING CHICK MAGNET ALL THE GIRLS WANT MY D HE BETTER APPRECIATE ME IF HE WANTS ME TO SHARE THESE GIRLS.

but honestly, i think i’d like the challenge. i want to be a life-changer. have my roommate tell stories of how he was a homophobic fuck and how i’ve changed his close-mindedness and have him become more accepting.
that would be cool.

unless he asks for a room change LOL but whatever i’m going to rule the world so it’s his loss

i think it’s about high time i make a piano cover again

requests
REQUESTS

????

how old do you have to be to be a porn star

considering it

its 10:46 pm and

i need a friend

preferably a guy cause girls tend to start unnecessary drama

and a guy who isnt bitchy

someone that i can just talk to omfg is that so much to ask for

i dont trust anyone anymore

i lost all my friends

so kenny is on the phone whining because he misses me so much

i miss him too 
:( but i dont tell him cause i like keeping my feelings in check

the way you feel about me, i feel that way about you too kenny.
i wish i was there for you…

i wish i could be there, seriously.
it hurts me too that i can’t physically be with you all the time,

i’m crazy about you, kenny.

i really am.

gonna write this because I don’t want to forget it

there were trees and the branches were moving. as if they were veiny and being controlled. you know when like voldemort casts a spell and everything starts rotting away as if they’re disgusted? yeah. so rotting tree corpses that just swayed.

and there’s a kid. I heard in dreams that it’s impossible to see yourself but I guess it doesn’t count cause it was a 5 year old version of me? and of course my little 5 year old self goes through the branches.

and is cut
skewered
bruised

but he comes out in the end
of the branches
all covered in blood.

and looks up to what appears to be a 25-26 year-old-ish guy.
and the child smiles,
laughs,
not in the wicked way but in the pure, “protective way”
while the older guy cries

this goes on for a while until the older guy pats the child on the head and says thanks

and that’s when I realize the 25 year old is me and it’s a metaphorical representation of how even though I have a rocky and painful past, there is something huge that is waiting for me in the future. and that I should be grateful for the harsh experiences because it will turn me into a better person.

someone dared me to “kiss the hottest person in the room”

… i couldn’t do it cause i didn’t know how to kiss myself

so i’m quitting work tomorrow…
and i don’t want to be a pussy and text her that i’m quitting so i’m just going to go in and tell her.

but i don’t even know how to start the conversation…
like what do i say?
“hi, i have to talk to you?” blegh.

what should i do?
what are the right things to say?

ive been getting hate because of kenny.
well not recently, this has been going on for a month.

and the only reason i don’t reply to you motherfuckers is because your words are so HILARIOUS LOL I DON’T EVEN GET OFFENDED. 

the words “go die” is just second nature to me. i laugh at when you tell me to go die because it’s not going to happen so you can all FUCK YOURSELVES BECAUSE YOUR LIFE IS A DISAPPOINTMENT AND YOUR PARENTS ARE PROBABLY REGRETTING GIVING BIRTH TO YOU HAHAHAHAHAH!!11!!1!

omg and then there is the classic “i’m going to report you to the cops” SHUT THE FUCK UP. we didn’t have sex first OF ALL. and second of all do you know how it is proven that there was statutory rape? BY DNA TESTING. so I DO NOT KNOW ABOUT YOU BUT I’M PRETTY FUCKING SURE KENNY DOESN’T WANT A PROBE STUCK UP HIS ASS FOR RAPE PROOF. omg you anons make me laugh

do you think you phase me???????????
no because you are all ignorant jealous little shitheads!!!!!
probably jealous cause he doesn’t give you attention omg you make me grimace and you are as irrelevant to me as the guy your dad fucked to cheat on your mom

yeah i went there
smd goodbye
stop sending me hate if you think i’m going to reply

actually keep going on
fill up my ask and make me feel famous <3

YOU THIRSTY BITCHES
I AIN’T GON QUENCH YO THIRST I AINT GATORADE

1+1 is 2

not gwiyomi

gtfo

i honestly only care about 

my laptop

food

and you

I remember reading somewhere that “love is when you put someone else’s feelings before yours”

I’ve never felt that. until now.

so work was really interesting today. and really fast. so there was this guy named Vincent that I had a problem with. idk. so I started work with a friend named ping and him, me, and Kyungmin became really good friends. Vincent started working a month later. I didn’t really like him in the beginning because the way he spoke was sort of awkward. and then I sort of thought he was a threat because he was really good at being a salesman. he was good at the one thing I lacked at. idk. I guess jealousy sort of kills relationships. but anyways, we both got mad at each other and got at it and I sort of spoke to him coldly. I guess he felt bad about it and my manager noticed so she told me to say sorry. so I did… because I had to, not because I wanted to.
but today, it was just him and me working and at first I was so disappointed cause I’ve never really worked one on one with him like I have with ping and Kyungmin. but… I let it all out. I was like, “it’s awkward between us. so to break the ice I’m just going to tell you something. I’m gay and I’m in love with you” LOL but I was joking and he laughed. he took it really lightly and idk I guess his laugh made me laugh. so I punched him on the arm and we just started talking about everything.
like how he broke up with his girlfriend and how I’m falling for a freshman. and then I acted really gay around him but it was the funny type of gay and he played along. turns out he already had a gay friend and they joked around like that.
idk. it was really cool. in the beginning I didn’t like him that much but we bonded in just one day.
hehe he’s working tomorrow and so is Kyungmin so I know tomorrow’s gonna be a fun day. and then I have a week off thank god.
and my manager bought me dinner today and everything.
.D. really good day

and…
so there was this guy in middle school who I suspected was gay but I couldn’t say anything because I was the fat loser kid and he was the really popular guy that every girl wanted and every guy wanted to be friends with. I had the hugest crush on him for over 2 years and I confessed and he laughed at me and got everyone to shit on me. anyways, I saw him today at a mall near work and he came up to me and said “hi”
at that moment I didn’t know who he was so I was like “hi? do I know you?” and idk I dressed okay today and looked pretty nice for no reason so maybe that’s why he approached me but he was like “yeah, don’t you remember me? I went to school with you” and then I realized who he was cause he had that same way of talking. slurring his words really slowly. idk he seemed really straight which is why I liked him in middle school????
but I was like “oh yeah. you were the guy who got everyone to make fun of me cause I was gay!” idk. I wanted to be mean cause he was a douchebag to me for no reason. he was really quiet and said sorry and in my head I was like “yeah that’s right” but all of a sudden he says “yeah so I’m gay” and I was like “I KNEW IT. I CALLED IT”.
jk I didn’t. I said “oh” cause I didn’t want to seem extremely rude to him cause he was telling me his secret.
and then all of a sudden he says “can I get your number? let me take you out sometime. wow you changed, you’re mad cute”
and idk but that is NOT the way things work for me. I thought that was belittling. like he thought I was gonna automatically say yes??? but I said “no thanks. I mean maybe if you didn’t humiliate me when we went to school together. I mean I used to like you, but nah. anyways I have to go. seeya”
I felt bad but it was a good release. whatever, he deserved it.

and nigga. I already know I’m cute

LOL jk